After another round of owner meetings concluded this Wednesday, the NFL announced they would be administering a new rule, requiring NFL teams to have one player sing the national anthem before each game.
Each week the country will vote for its favorite NFL singers, who will have to make sure they hit each note of the Anthem perfectly, while also providing their own flair and personality to the historic piece.
The winner of each week will move on to the next leg of the bracket, while the player with the fewest votes each week, will have his team assessed a 30-yard penalty at the beginning of the next game.
At the end of the regular season, two finalists will compete for the prize of getting the final wildcard spot in the playoffs, regardless of record. “We figure people care way more about this than actual football anymore, and we need to keep evolving the game” said beloved figurehead Roger Goodell.
As the NFL gets further and further into the season, viewers can expect NFL players to bring out as much pizazz as they can. “I’m not getting voted off, I’ve already spent a good amount of time during OTA’s working on my octaves” replied Cam Newton when asked to comment.
This new rule is sure to bring controversy to the league. Early reports indicate that Patriots Head Coach Bill Belichick has been contemplating retirement, after finding out about the new rules.
The NFL has yet to announce how the tournament will affect the playoffs once they begin. Various inside sources say that that the tournament will restart during the playoffs, but with the additional requirement that among remaining teams, the anthem be sung duet-style.